Daily Dose of Funny
- Thread starter PhantmOfTheOpra
- Start date
In study hall, teacher asked my friend whether he was going to do black history or French work. He said "French Black History!". I said "yeah, you can call it Pinot Noir!"
I used to think that "heteronormative" meant a person who liked to have fetish-free and foreplay-free sex.
Just finished watching an episode of The Big Bang Theory, and i only now am realizing how creepy it must be to record a laugh track. I mean, it's not like they are laughing at something, or else there would be background noise, so it must literally be (as far as I can tell) a room full of people laughing their heads off while totally straight faced.
Sloths are what happen when coconuts come alive.
(Sorry if this is already somewhere on here, I have a nagging suspicion)
(Sorry if this is already somewhere on here, I have a nagging suspicion)
I typed C4 like 5 times into this new vending machine at the mall, and it still keeps giving me the Wheat Thins instead of explosives.
This joke might stink, but who cares.
You know what sucks about being a male black widow spider, is that your wife has to eat you, That bites
You know what sucks about being a male black widow spider, is that your wife has to eat you, That bites
A great way to mess with a jogger is to run up alongside him and say "It's okay, I think we lost him."
If you ever feel unattractive, remember that you look like your ancestors and they all got laid.
New best comeback to be used against people who are wrong: I could eat alphabet soup... and SHIT a better argument then that.
Why should we bother to learn things related to quantum theory? Because that is the only way we will be able to figure out where socks disappear to when you put them in the dryer.
After months of placing a bowl of Skittles out for my friends, I have now filled it with Skittles, M&Ms, Reeces Pieces, and Mint Bites. Let the games... Begin.