Silence. I’ve wanted it all my life but now that I have it, it’s terrifying. Especially this silence. A complete communication black out. I don’t know who did it or why, but one thing is for sure: I’ll never find out. The EMP even hit us up here and the shock wave sent us flying. And now, here I am. Adrift. In the complete vacuum of space where no one is going to hear me. I don’t know how much oxygen is left but last I was able to check it was at nine percent. There is nothing I can do. No one is going to be sent up here to get me. No one is going to remember me.
Silence. It’s as beautiful as it is scary. I can fill the silence with my thoughts. Thoughts of Earth. Thoughts of home. I can hear my breathing. It is slow and steady, as if I am asleep. Although the irony of the thought is I will soon be drifting into a never waking slumber. Perhaps I am already dead. But I hear my heart. Steady. It will be the last thing to give up, even though I already have.
I listen to that for a while. But my thoughts want to be heard too. I think about college and all the classes I had to take. I think about all the women I dated and wondered which one out there, down there, I would have married. I guess she doesn’t exist. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be about to die out here, alone, in the unforgiving space of the all-encompassing vacuum.
No one’s ever going to come and get me. More important things are happening than needing to save one man, adrift in space. I accept my fate and smile. When I was younger, I always wanted to be alone. I always wanted to go to space. Explore the unknown. Pioneer. And it looks like I will die pioneering. Die alone. Die in silence. If a tree in the forest falls, but no one’s around to hear it, does it make any noise? If a man adrift in space, screams out of desperation, screams out of a longing to live, does he make a noise? A sound? Is he really alive? Silence. I’m starting to get light headed. My oxygen is almost gone. Maybe a supernatural being will open the heavens and refill my tank. Why would he do that? It would only be prolonging my death. Is there something, someone greater that can hear my cries? I accept the thought as yes. I want to at least die with the illusion of not being alone. I think to pray but I am starting to gasp. My soul reaches out, cries out.
In all this time, I never thought about the people down there, what they must be suffering through. I can see explosions on the surface of the earth. It looks like a war. I don’t care who wins. I’m almost dead. My vision is starting to get blurry and dark. I am now gasping for breath. I scream a real scream for the first time of my life. My lungs burn as my vision goes.
I don’t want to sleep but I try to accept it. My mind has already accepted it. My soul has already accepted it. But my body isn’t going to. Not until it has completely shut down. I’m dizzy and feel myself spiraling into darkness. I hope someone mourns my passing. Silence.
Silence. It’s as beautiful as it is scary. I can fill the silence with my thoughts. Thoughts of Earth. Thoughts of home. I can hear my breathing. It is slow and steady, as if I am asleep. Although the irony of the thought is I will soon be drifting into a never waking slumber. Perhaps I am already dead. But I hear my heart. Steady. It will be the last thing to give up, even though I already have.
I listen to that for a while. But my thoughts want to be heard too. I think about college and all the classes I had to take. I think about all the women I dated and wondered which one out there, down there, I would have married. I guess she doesn’t exist. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be about to die out here, alone, in the unforgiving space of the all-encompassing vacuum.
No one’s ever going to come and get me. More important things are happening than needing to save one man, adrift in space. I accept my fate and smile. When I was younger, I always wanted to be alone. I always wanted to go to space. Explore the unknown. Pioneer. And it looks like I will die pioneering. Die alone. Die in silence. If a tree in the forest falls, but no one’s around to hear it, does it make any noise? If a man adrift in space, screams out of desperation, screams out of a longing to live, does he make a noise? A sound? Is he really alive? Silence. I’m starting to get light headed. My oxygen is almost gone. Maybe a supernatural being will open the heavens and refill my tank. Why would he do that? It would only be prolonging my death. Is there something, someone greater that can hear my cries? I accept the thought as yes. I want to at least die with the illusion of not being alone. I think to pray but I am starting to gasp. My soul reaches out, cries out.
In all this time, I never thought about the people down there, what they must be suffering through. I can see explosions on the surface of the earth. It looks like a war. I don’t care who wins. I’m almost dead. My vision is starting to get blurry and dark. I am now gasping for breath. I scream a real scream for the first time of my life. My lungs burn as my vision goes.
I don’t want to sleep but I try to accept it. My mind has already accepted it. My soul has already accepted it. But my body isn’t going to. Not until it has completely shut down. I’m dizzy and feel myself spiraling into darkness. I hope someone mourns my passing. Silence.
